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getting sober [Aug. 23rd, 2006|10:28 pm]
[mood |confusedconfused]
[music |Flaming lips]

so here i stand...more than confused than ever...it's been a little over 2 weeks now since i've either done coke or dope...which is very good...and it's been 2 days now since i've smoked or drank...well getting sober from the hard stuff means you have to get sober from all drugs...including smoking and drinking..mushrooms too?!...which was like so much a part of my life...and i still love so much...so now im stuck because i dont know what to doooo...I want to keep doing it so much but i dont want to be fighting getting sober for the rest of my lifee....BLEH. why does life have to be so complicated...does this mean i'm not ready to be getting sober? I just want an answer...I just want it to be easy...I just want to fucking be ok and be able to smoke a joint without it being a crime or have a cold one and it end at that..I dunno i'm just very confused. can't you tell? oh and it gets more complicated because my boyfriends NOW finally getting serious about getting sober and is in rehab and keeps asking me if im clean...and i dont want to not help him...I want to be able to tell him i'm clean but...I want to be able to go to a concert and eat some mushrooms...whats wrong with this picture?

[User Picture]From: 2many8sidedremz
2006-08-27 08:08 am (UTC)
i probly havent posted in this thing longer than yourself, but, my 2 cents. i recently quit doing the heavier stuff and downsized to more manageable "highs" mainly bud, and suffice it to say no matter what you or anyone else says, it wasnt nor will ever be a drug, its a plant.. fucking christ. Shrooms, god forbid you should ever go without some penicillin, of course you are probly into them and/or have better ones than i have access to here in florida. i look at it like this, i dont see taking drugs as a problem OR a solution, simply a means to get fucked up- in any way shape or form you see fit. Now, the superficialists say that the stuff is bad for you and whine about its effects, little did they know that eating mcdonalds would do almost the same shit. Bunch of geniouses leading our country by the way(SARCASM!). Personally, i think, that if you are doing your shit in real life.. I.E. going to school/work attempting to go to school or work, or anything of that genre.. you can do whatever you please AND LIKE IT. Same with your boyfriend, of course that works quite the opposite aswell.. because if you arent doing your RL shit, you are a drain on your fam/friends by slackin it up. case in point: It is possible to live a life and do drugs, the rate at which you do them is entirely up to you, but before you go setting a pace, think about what would interest you the most and stop thinking of your life as a prison cell of narcotics, still dont know myself exactly what i should think of it as, we all have our problems and mine suffice it to say is abit more complicated than quiting drugs, i need to quite alot of other shit along the way, and hell if anything ima need w.e drugs i got left to get me through the next few years of confusion. I bet your thinking "confusion" BOINK! hit a sweetspot didnt i ^_~, hrre is your simple str8 answer love - Though there may be much confusion in your life, continue to power through it, like a drill to the earth (im lacking on the analogies at the moment) And when you get really lost go do some homework or something LEGIT to sidetrack you from teen issues.

p.s. if your boyfriend was your drug buddy, it may be a good idea to space yourself from him if even for a short time, i used to have a "drug buddy" and no matter how hard we tried to quit everytime we were around each other memories would replay im our heads of times when we felt like we were flying kites in euphoria-land and all that jazz. Yah, you know what im talking about. Alot easier once this distraction is put to rest, if even for a small period of time.i took the time to type this, imterpret it how you will and the best of luck to you.

p.s. (2) now that i think about it you are that really fine girl from jersey, ill tell you the easy way out, get a tan and take your fine ass to a modeling agency.. Grunjy is more the style now anyway, and believe you me you fit the category for a "fine-female". Its a dam shame i dont live near you or id be right there with you getting plastered on w/e you put infront of me. or maybe even your distressed bf.. god forbid (jokes <3) ^_~ cya
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[User Picture]From: 2many8sidedremz
2006-08-27 08:11 am (UTC)
"go do some homework or something LEGIT to sidetrack you from teen issues."

let me clarify so you dont misunderstan me i use the term "teen" to signify the age in which these problems arose, not the mindset.
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